Dean Winchester (
always_enduphere) wrote2013-06-14 09:36 pm
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It helps to know the place is there.
Dean's been standing outside of it for the better part of an hour. Not close, and not where anyone who might recognize him might see him. Just near enough to see the small, nearly invisible sign, hanging there for only willing eyes to notice.
He won't go in. But it helps to know that if he had to, if he really needed to, he could.
Shuffling deeper into his jacket despite the warm night air, Dean looks down at his boots, tongues at the blankness between his ears, the cotton stuffing up his chest. He can stay here, still and quiet, and not think.
It only lasts a moment more before he hears feet beating hard against the pavement, turning the corner and moving fast.
Dean's been standing outside of it for the better part of an hour. Not close, and not where anyone who might recognize him might see him. Just near enough to see the small, nearly invisible sign, hanging there for only willing eyes to notice.
He won't go in. But it helps to know that if he had to, if he really needed to, he could.
Shuffling deeper into his jacket despite the warm night air, Dean looks down at his boots, tongues at the blankness between his ears, the cotton stuffing up his chest. He can stay here, still and quiet, and not think.
It only lasts a moment more before he hears feet beating hard against the pavement, turning the corner and moving fast.
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"And he's really, really not, so I'd appreciate if you didn't say anything."
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Derek doesn't know much about Dean's past. Or anything, really. But apparently he feels like there's something that he needs to be punished for and if anyone can understand that, it's Derek. "Hey man, I get it. Trust me."
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Dean straightens up, trying to recover some scrap of the dignity he can feel rapidly draining out of him. "I just need to get out of my head sometimes. That's all."
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He doesn't say "in the mirror" because he's not that much of a cliche, but he assumes Dean will catch his meaning. "If it's not about the sex it's about the other thing. And you already implied that it wasn't about the sex."
He shrugs, trying to show that he doesn't judge. "If the thought of strangers touching me didn't make me want to wig out, I probably would have ended up in the same place. Some messed up clubs in New York."
It's not exactly easy to talk about this stuff with Dean, but it's not that hard either. Derek decides not to try to read too deeply into why that is and just go with it.
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"I never did 'til here," he admits. "For all the fucked up shit that happens here, most of the time it's quiet. There's too much room to think." And too damn much to dwell on.
"So what do you do?" Dean finds himself asking. "When you're after 'the other thing'?"
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His chest aches with how much he misses her. She was so good at being alpha. She was born for it, even if it was thrust upon her too early. Derek is a joke compared to her.
"We sort of belonged to this pack in the city. Technical bullshit since we were on their territory." He rubs the back of his neck and furrows his brow. "Some of the guys would fight each other near the full moons, just to get rid of some of the excess energy. I'd join in sometimes."
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"You do werewolf fight club to blow off steam?" he asks, turning towards Derek with a tiny smile. "Is there anything left standing?"
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"Werewolf fight club. Yeah, I guess it was. They were all alright guys, for the most part. We'd set up a place where no humans would come across us and just kind of go at it." His fingertips itch as he remembers it. "Then we'd heal up and go get a beer, even though we can't get drunk."
He looks over at the club again, and he couldn't imagine walking inside. It goes against his every instinct to submit to anyone, especially now that he's the alpha. "There's gotta be a better way." He jerks his head at the club. "Than submitting to strangers."
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Looking away from the club, he studies Derek with a clinical eye. "Heal up, huh? The werewolves in my world didn't do that. How strong are you?"
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Dean may be an alright guy, but he's still a hunter. "Silver bullets, though? That's bullshit."
As for his strength, well. Derek has always been a fan of showing off. He looks around, since it would be a bad idea to punch through a wall, and takes a few steps over to a car parked on the curb. He grabs the front bumper with one hand, lifts it a few inches off of the ground, and sets it back down lightly.
"Pretty strong," he says when he comes back over. "But I'm good at controlling it. Haven't accidentally broken anything since I was a kid. It's just kind of like, I don't know. An extra muscle that I only flex when I need it."
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Dean sighs, remembering Madison, and worse - what the memory of Madison did to Sam. "Total blank come sunrise. No idea, and no control over any of it."
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"I did my best to keep an eye on him, help him out. Stiles helped a lot. He's got a handle on it now." He rubs the back of his neck and looks over at him. "But I'm a born wolf, was raised by a pack. I learned how to control it early. I can get antsy on the full moon but I don't even have to shift if I don't want to."
He wants to ask Dean what hunters like him would have done if they discovered a peaceful pack of wolves who never harmed anyone, if they would have given them a death sentence as well. But he doesn't.
"So." He jerks his chin towards the club and raises a brow. "You gonna resist temptation, or should I drag you off by the scruff?"
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He does give Obsidian a last look though, sighing as he pushes away from the wall. "Guess I'm blowing off steam the old fashioned way today," he says. "Shouldn't be too hard to find a barfly dumb enough to fight."
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He grins, showing off his teeth. It'd be good to blow off some steam, and it'd be nice to get a few swings on a hunter. Even if it's one he kind of likes.
But really, he'd rather have Dean take his frustration out on him than some idiot that has no idea what's going on.
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"I got groundrules," he says, and doesn't miss that they're very nearly the same as his rules inside Obsidian. "No permanent marks, no broken bones, no ruptured organs. And however it is you turn people in your world - none of that."
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He pushes away from the wall and looks around. "A bite from an alpha turns you. Which I am, but I wouldn't give it without consent. Most wolves wouldn't Where are we going to do this?"
He's a bit excited to feel a rush of adrenaline again. He and Dean are in this for the same reasons. Drastically unhealthy reasons, but same nonetheless.
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Cracking his neck, Dean starts walking deeper into the alley. "You done this before? Sparred with a human?"
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He follows Dean down the alley, hiking his shorts up over his hips. "Why don't you hit me as hard as you think you can take it, and I'll match it. You look tough. I don't think I'll break you."
He stops once they reach an open space and stands there, arms at his sides and chin out.
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"I nearly died a month and a half ago," says Dean. "Technically, I did die. I was possessed for a long time, and demons aren't exactly kind to the host." Dean clears his throat. It's as close as pride will let him come to asking Derek not to laugh, and Dean looks down at his own hands, aware of how pitifully human they are.
But he survived the apocalypse and then some, and his body has no qualms about a fight, falling into the right stance as easy as breathing. Dean looks at Derek, thinks about Sam and his own 'pretty face' and Castiel's blistered, ruined back, and decks him across the cheekbone as hard as he can.
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He doesn't have time to think more about it before Dean strikes him, head snapping to the side with the force of it. He stretches his jaw to the side and turns back to him, nodding a bit. "Not bad for a dead guy."
He looks at Dean, trying to find any clue that this isn't what he wants. His heartbeat is even, not scared, and that's good enough for him. He rears back and clocks him on the jaw, matching the force of Dean's punch.
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Straightening up, he smiles a little, shaking his shoulders out against the desire to tense up. "Well, we've clocked each other one. You pissed off enough to fight me yet, or do I have to call you furball or something?"
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He lunges forward, eyes flickering red as he aims his second punch for his jaw.
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"If you were gonna kill me," he says, knees bent and eyes wary, "What would you do?" Might as well make this a learning experience, as well as a cathartic one. "Throat or belly, claws or teeth?"
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"Contrary to what you might think, I've never thought about killing a human for fun." He stalks a circle around Dean, eyes flashing as he lets out a low rumble of a growl. "But I could snap your neck faster than you could blink. Tear out your throat with my teeth if I didn't mind making a mess."
Which yeah, this probably doesn't help prove his point when he says he's not dangerous, but he's so goddamn tired of being seen as an animal by anyone, especially hunters.
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"That the reputation back home?" he asks, even as he rushes in. He doesn't have much hope, now, of landing the blow he's aimed at Derek's kidneys, but it's good exercise all the same.
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Dean has nothing to do with the Argents; they don't even exist in his world. But he can't help but to look up at him desperately, like he can help provide answers.
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Dean stands, but he doesn't feel much like punching anymore. "But humans are just as bad. Vampires, werewolves, demons, djinn. Nobody's got the monopoly on being a monster."
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The wind has gone out of his sails, adrenaline gone until he's left sagging. He doesn't want to fight. So instead he just holds out his hand. It's a symbol of something, maybe. A peace offering or an understanding. There are bad hunters and there are bad werewolves, and none of them can speak for the groups they belong to.
"I'm sorry about your family," he gets out as he waits to see if Dean will take his hand. He says it in a way that only someone who knows exactly how it feels could, brows furrowed a bit. "Mine's all gone too."
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"Could come here," he says. "Your family." Dropping his gaze, Dean grits his jaw against a frown. "My brother was here until a few weeks ago."
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He wants to ask what happened to Dean's brother, but he doesn't think he'd much like to hear the question. Instead he just turns to sag against the brick wall next to Dean. "Lost my sister last year. She was - " He laughs but there's no humor in it, and he scrubs his hand over his face. "She would my whole world."
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"She - " he says and stops. "It wasn't a hunter?"
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He lets out a dark chuckle and sniffs, tipping his head back to let it thunk against the brick. "That's why I'm the alpha and I get to have all this power I don't even want."
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He chuckles a bit and pushes off the wall. "And I had a lot of siblings, but not that many." He holds out his hand for Dean again, tilting his head a bit. "Are we done here, or do I need to kick your ass some more?"
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Derek would understand either way. "You up for a drink? Won't do shit for me but I don't mind the taste."
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"Wait, really?" Dean asks. "You heal so fast...not even whiskey?"
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